Last week for the first time ever I had two attacks in one day. I cannot describe the bitter disappointment I felt and the fear that maybe things were not getting better, but worse. However the one good thing after an attack is that the next day my hearing returns and I feel good. Every time I have an attack I hope that it will be the last and that the nightmare is over and I have my life back.
The ups and downs of this illness are well documented by all who have it - so at least I am comforted in the knowledge that I am just 'typical'. Using the word normal does not really apply here!
Friday and Saturday were sooo good. We went out for the evening with friends - such fun. Saturday we went shopping - aaahhh - almost back to normal and seemed as if it was all behind us now. But Sunday - back to the usual performance - arghhhh!
I felt awful at church, but it passed off. We went to our family study class and I began to feel sick, so I took a tablet hoping it would pass off again. But no - my head began to feel heavy again and spaced out, so I knew I needed to lie down. I staggered to the car, grateful that no one was there watching and wondering if I am having a problem with the Word of Wisdom....
My husband is good - he knows I need to go home. So he says nothing and drives quickly home so I can get to bed. I sleep for about three hours and feel so much better when I wake. But I resist the urge to go about my normal tasks, knowing that I need to continue to rest. It is sooo hard.
It is my sister's birthday so I decide to call her and we chat for an hour or so. Sooo good to talk to someone that I do not have to translate my words for and who speaks as I do. She is sooo supportive of all my troubles. I regret our inablity to get on with each other years ago - seems a lot of time wasted. Now I think we really appreciate each other and enjoy the time we spend together.
So... the days go by and whatever - life goes on...... I just hope that soon the good days will outnumber the bad days.
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