Thursday, May 7, 2009

Victor Meldrew

I cannot believe it!! I am having a Victor Meldrew moment - against all the odds and possibilities available to me today, things have gone horribly wrong.

I woke this morning, clammy, the back of my neck feeling hot and uncomfortable and experiencing a sinking feeling. I felt as if I was lying at an angle with my head tilting backwards and yet I was not. I knew what was coming and I hoped that it wouldn't, but it did. Bang - full scale attack with all the relevant symptoms, but this time my arms and hands are tingling with pins and needles - odd sensation.

Thankfully I am on my own so there is no one to watch me crawl to the bathroom.

I have an appointment today at 10am with someone who is going to help me get my CV right and help me find a job. 

I look at the clock - it is 7am. I wonder if I will be able to make it. The attack lasts almost an hour and all I want to do is sleep. I decide to take an anti vertigo/nausea pill and hope that I will be ok.

Ha ha ha - how foolish and amusing  I must've looked when I ventured out of bed. I can't walk in a straight line and still feel terrible. But I need to make this appointment somehow. After managing a shower in some sort of drunken way, I realise, most disppointingly, that I am not going to be able to drive and must contact the person to cancel the appointment for the second time. I hope she is understanding and doesn't see me as a pathetic attention seeking time waster.

I feel at a total loss and wonder what I am going to do. 

When I explain to some people what I have wrong with me I usually get one of two responses - Never heard of it - what is it? Or even better - well it isn't life threatening is it and lots of other people have it. Then they proceed to tell me of famous people who have it. Perhaps they think, that by some miracle, the sharing of this information will cure me or at least relieve me of the symptoms........

Hopefully soon the beast will go back to sleep and remain undisturbed for many years and I will be able to function again


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